Clearing 1: Happy Hippy Parent

All my life I've been in and out of relationships because of my roller coaster mood. There was a time when my ex-boyfriend and all his friends called me"Tsunami".  Part of me wasn't amused by the sound of it because I wasn't happy with my own behavior and I didn't know what was wrong with me so I always blamed it on PMS.  I'm sure PMS has a lot to do with it.  There are a lot of things that caused PMS, food, lifestyle, and exercise, etc.  At the time I didn't know about yoga yet, and being an actress, I was always on a diet trying to make myself look as skinny as possible, I was smoking and partying, the lists could go on and on on how my PMS was killing the relationships with my ex-lovers and MYSELF.

Today, I do my "work", which is yoga, meditation(as much as I can), I eat better, I've stopped smoking for many years, I don't party anymore.  Yet my roller coaster mood is still here.  WHY!

I tend to snap a lot.  I wake up feeling moody.  I have attitude. And the person who's effected by this is my  husband.

I'm ashamed of my behavior. I don't want my husband or my child to be unhappy. But at the same time is hate being judged.  It hurts when someone points out your flaws.  But today, I let my ego be crushed to the ground by my husband.  Vincent pointed out all the bad things he sees in me and I had to bite my tongue, smiled, and answer YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT BABY.

I have to tell you it hurts as hell saying that, I almost cried but seconds later.

Something shifted, I feel free.  And here I am Clearing myself for the second time with you, the people I love.  I ask the Universe today to be free from this behavior.

I pray to be a Happy Hippy Parent.  I don't mind if Stella goes around and smile at everybody she sees, I want her to be a happy person.  And that has to start with me.

Thank you Vincent for everything.  You're my GURU

Love Is All You Need